Wet Wilderness & The Great Unknown

Random thoughts, happenings, and etc.:

I have been offered a place to study fashion design in RMIT Australia, in 2007.

It's raining so damn much nowadays that it's barely enjoyable; who cares if you have to work while the weather is more condusive for sleeping in? You can't go anywhere without getting dirty and wet. Plus a dirty wet umbrella to deal with, which is easily lost.

I am extremely sleep deprived, it's so bad that I'm forgetting ridiculously. My short-term memory is probably gone. I can forget to switch off the lights even after being reminded minutes ago. I can forget a brand new waterbottle, bought just yesterday, leaving all 7 bucks of it, full of water, in the cab. I can forget to eat, forget my lover's birthday, forget something you told me just now. My brain is dying.

My parents and I are not getting along. Maybe the communication breakdown is complete. The difference in wavelength, misunderstanding, misinterpreting...and yet because I inherited all my personality flaws and communication behavioural traits from them...it's a bloody cycle of stupid emotional trauma I just want to escape from.

We all have our moments of insecurity, fragility, helplessness, and worthlessness. My parents have never made me feel worthy or self-respecting...funny how the people who created you and raised you can also torment you the most and inflict the most agony. We've lived together for so long and yet we barely tolerate each other; there's never enough patience.

Fine, if my life is screwed up, I'm really going to run away then. What now? What then?

I have no idea.